While trying to join my server and being stuck on the loading screen I had a friend join me via Steam Friends List and was able to get into my server after only a couple seconds of loading. I was not able to get in to my server using this but if you and your friend are out of options I recommend everyone try that, in the meantime I'm still awaiting some official instruction from Ark devs or Survival Servers.
I cannot connect to my server either, it shows up in the steam browser when I type in my password I get treated to an endless black loading screen with mist and the Ark logo at the bottom right. One time the loading screen was different with a very large Ark logo in the center but did not load either. My other community members are getting treated to the same thing